Plenty of stress builds up when you have a large family like ours. Life can throw you real curve balls and blind side you right into full-blown panic. Things seem to run along smoothly and then…flat tire.
My response has been panic too many times. (Believe me, I talk with my sister about this too often). But I’m speaking more about relationships in our lives, not flat tires.
There is so much to juggle with being sure we say the right thing so we don’t offend any people. Even if we think we are walking in the Spirit, we can be blindsided by something that causes us to react…instantly.
I can honestly say that in my humanness I still try to set up “the plan of attack” when something hits me…something of grave consequence. I think I need a plan so things will go smoothly…according to me. Often I don’t even take a breath before I charge in and put things in order. Order, sure I like order. I’m a first-born and need to put my chicks in a row. It’s easier that way…for everyone.
I have trouble with feeling responsible to fix anyone who wants help, or complains about something or someone. After all I’m a mother, am I not?
Have you ever felt this way?
I need the hands off policy when it comes to people and relationships. I should be able to listen, but only encourage, and not necessarily agree…and definitely not worry.
These are a few things I need to remember:
- Stop blaming myself for things I can’t control, such as other people, (past or present).
- Stop letting people force their problems on me and expect me to fix them.
- Stop letting people complain to me about anything, as if I should do something about it.
- Stop making rash judgments of others. I don’t know what they are going through.
- Stop expecting people to be what I want them to be.
- Stop waiting for someone to change, because it’s not my job. Even if I pray for them, they may not change. I need to accept my daily portion.
- Hardest of all: stop expecting close loved ones to fulfill my needs.
I am not God!
The more I take on, the less I trust God. The more I act my own boss…the more I am anxious!
I clearly can’t hear God at all!
When things in life get hot, troubling, or stressful…He wants me to rest.
Sometimes it means physical rest, and sometimes He makes me!
Note to myself: remember what Paul said…
“…continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.”
Phil. 2:12-16 NIV
Instead of grumbling…
“Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ.”
Eph. 6:19-21 NIV
And then remember some of my favorite words…
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
Matt. 11:28-30 Msg